Today in History—October 25: John and Abigail Adams Exchange Vows

During her wedding on this day in 1764, 19-year-old Abigail Smith had no way of knowing that marrying a Boston lawyer nine years older than her would lead to her becoming a new country’s first second lady, its second first lady, and the mother of its sixth president.

Little is known about the ceremony itself, but it’s often noted that Abigail’s father, a Congregational minister, presided over it. To allay his parishioners’ misgivings about lawyers—whom many viewed as dishonest—he cleverly warned them of being overly critical by citing a passage from the Book of Luke: “For John the Baptist has come eating no bread and drinking no wine, and you say, ‘He has a demon.’ ” (This is one of the Bible’s go-tos for calling out chronic critics who will invent an excuse to dislike anyone.)

And it’s this combination of wit and insight that Abigail herself came to be known for. As the demands of the Revolution and founding a new country repeatedly pulled John away, Abigail single-handedly kept their household afloat. She managed their farm, children (including a young John Quincy Adams), and finances—all while navigating the heavy legal limitations of coverture.

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The pair relied heavily on letter writing during John’s absences, and Abigail frequently used this medium to advocate for social change. She championed women’s education in 1778 when she told her husband that he “need not be told how much female education is neglected, nor how fashionable it has been to ridicule female learning.”

She was equally bold regarding governance. Months before the Continental Congress adopted the Declaration of Independence, she urged John to “remember the ladies,” warning that “all men would be tyrants if they could” and threatening a women-led rebellion if they were ignored.

John valued Abigail’s counsel so much that weeks after his presidential inauguration in 1797 he wrote to her from Philadelphia: “I never wanted your advice and assistance more in my life.”

Indeed, whether evaluating political rivals or advising on executive decisions, Abigail proved essential to John’s success, securing her legacy as a true Founding Mother.